51. is it okay?
I keep maintaining this diary nobody asked me to,
no stories to add as my time persisted, no words to perceive,
the voice that is disappearing daily, slowly dematerialise my sense of living,
do I give off myself too much to not be wanted again?
so I keep thinking,
if my sombre ever brought peace to anyone,
the voice that is disappearing daily, slowly dematerialise my sense of living,
do I give off myself too much to not be wanted again?
so I keep thinking,
if my sombre ever brought peace to anyone,
or wondering if it is my concise to make them fade away,
so die with a single guilt and watch them say forever goodbye. is it okay?
I keep maintaining this diary nobody asked me about,
keep crying on days I meant nothing to say out loud,
once you are done making me your circumstantial love,
repeat patterns and history, then knock back on single malt scotch whiskey,
I keep maintaining this diary nobody asked me about,
keep crying on days I meant nothing to say out loud,
once you are done making me your circumstantial love,
repeat patterns and history, then knock back on single malt scotch whiskey,
deliquesing away like ice on it's flimsy glass surface,
can I have a moment to myself?
is there something else i need to bet on? somewhere else i have to be?
don't know who I am anymore lately, am I the one to blame? do you hate me or if I am being too much of myself?
is it okay? I asked as no one stayed.
can we go out while you hold my hands,
and eat ice cream, the one I really like,
fake and make it as if our time never ends,
but it's melting away so stay for a little while,
alter this chemistry in hindsight,
would that be okay?
but you are marching ahead woven, leaving me alone in your lie of march 29th,
what's the use of keeping receipts anyway,
I'm already waiting for July but never to meet you again,
can I have a moment to myself?
is there something else i need to bet on? somewhere else i have to be?
don't know who I am anymore lately, am I the one to blame? do you hate me or if I am being too much of myself?
is it okay? I asked as no one stayed.
can we go out while you hold my hands,
and eat ice cream, the one I really like,
fake and make it as if our time never ends,
but it's melting away so stay for a little while,
alter this chemistry in hindsight,
would that be okay?
but you are marching ahead woven, leaving me alone in your lie of march 29th,
what's the use of keeping receipts anyway,
I'm already waiting for July but never to meet you again,
but what if we did and you ask me how it has been all this time,
will that be okay? well I must be insane
sojourned through all harboured grudges,
the silence slowly fades away,
make my voice disappear daily, slowly
dematerialise my sense of living,
smoulder the bindings of all our vaulted bridges,
kill the key to my findings, burn up the trust built over past ages,
put on a brave face, and now it's time to turn these pages,
write in my diary, the idea of something, the idea of home,
the feelings they write songs about,
the idea of someone, the one, to never come yet pretend it's all going to be okay
Is it okay?
sojourned through all harboured grudges,
the silence slowly fades away,
make my voice disappear daily, slowly
dematerialise my sense of living,
smoulder the bindings of all our vaulted bridges,
kill the key to my findings, burn up the trust built over past ages,
put on a brave face, and now it's time to turn these pages,
write in my diary, the idea of something, the idea of home,
the feelings they write songs about,
the idea of someone, the one, to never come yet pretend it's all going to be okay
Is it okay?